The past week I have been drawing my friends as super heroes, they all turned out pretty cute but of course really sketchy. My friends are all “you should totally do this for money, set up a facebook page and charge people like $10 a person!” I am not sure how many people would actually want to pay for a sketchy drawing done on the computer. I mean it would be awesome if I could make money doing that because I totally need some cash but who am I kidding, who would want to purchase that?
I am posting the drawings I had done so far… we came up with the names of our super heroes from this facebook post we all did and one of the parts is “the colour of your shirt and the first object to your right is your super hero name”.

Is It Wrong of Me to Love My Own Face?

just went through my pictures to try and get some order and I have come to realize that I love my face. While moving pics to other folders I had to create a folder named “my face” because I have a rather large collection of pictures of myself.

Now you may say “Jesus Theresa, you are pretty vain!” and you know I would agree with you but I like to take pictures of my make-up. I got in the habit a long time ago to taking pictures of make-up looks for a make-up group. It was girls and guy sharing make-up tips and showing off their latest looks. It’s been a while since I have been part of this group but I still take pictures if I love the look.

I may not be the prettiest girl and I never had a ton of self-esteem but I would be lying if I say I hate my face. I love making myself over with beautiful colour eye-shadow and I enjoy looking at my own face. It’s my face, I have had this face my entire life, I look at this face every day, it would be a shame if when I looked upon my reflection and hated what I saw so I am glad I enjoy my face.

I have MASSIVE green eyes with long straight lashes; I have my great grandmother’s nose and tiny almost non existing lips that have been scared up from falling on my face as a child. I have a round head, big chubby RED cheeks and a double chin if I don’t take the picture at just the right angle. Somewhat nice shaped eyebrows and pin straight hair the colour of whatever I decided to colour it at the time to frame it all. This is my face, it is starting to show some signs of aging but not too much for a 31 year old and I am grateful.

I don’t know how or when I started to love my own face; I have managed to overcome self esteem issues and depression without medication. I didn’t need a boy or any person to tell me how beautiful I was, I did it myself. So why is it so hard for others to do the same and see their own beauty in the mirror? If anyone is reading this, I ask that you all go to the mirror, look at your face and tell yourself you are beautiful!! Stop comparing yourselves to Photoshopped models in magazines because NOONE is that perfect, not even the models themselves.

Three weeks left and this is what I do under pressure

OK I am actually supposed to be writing an essay on how Autism in children and the knowledge we have to provide these children with an actual life in society and how it is all interconnected to the world… :/ blah even when I write what the topic is it sounds fucking messed up and all over the place, however I am sitting here in class listening to punk music to try and get me all revved up I am still stuck. I know this entire class leads up to one bottom line and that is how everything is interconnected; fucking Suzuki, but Jesus Christ could I just draw a map or something?

I HATE GLOBAL GEOGRAPHY!! Don’t get me wrong, I love the topics and learning about places and other people around the world but the fact that I have to actually connect their situation with the rest of the world and what affects they have on everyone else on the planet. I suppose the more we know the more we may think about the issues around the world and do a little something to help, but I know once this class is done I will go on and do my own little thing and not keep up with current affairs. It isn’t because I don’t care, it’s because I just don’t have the time to worry about if Sally in Iran isn’t allowed to vote… I am worried about if I am going to make rent this month or if I am even going to have a job…. Am I going to be able to continue going to school next year or am I just going to finish this year and work in a call center until retirement… BAHAHA retirement, you don’t retire from a call centre, you either quit, get fired or die :/ such a bleak future I see. Maybe if aliens come down in 2012 and kill us all it won’t be so bad, and then I don’t have to do anything anymore.

I have been here for 3.5 hours and I have typed more in the last few seconds on this then I have all day for geography. Maybe if my teacher wasn’t so scatterbrained and knew how to ask a proper question this damn class wouldn’t have been so difficult. This is the only thing holding me back from graduation. I am done everything else I needed. It also doesn’t help with the fact that I haven’t ACTUALLY written an essay in like 10 years so the structure of my writing has become informal and I will fail because of it.

Throws arms up… apologizes for rant. Ends bullshit… sorry! <3

I really should be doing some work.

Don't Be Hating on the Fat Girl

I was just surfing the net when I came across some empowering voices from BBW. It got me thinking why is being fat such a horrible thing in our world, besides obvious health issues, if one was truly healthy yet overweight is it truly a big deal? I am a large woman and I am rather content with it. I know if I eat less take out and junk, exercise and eat healthy portions I could lose weight but why should I do this when I already love who I am. I do admit I dislike looking at myself in pictures with other people because I guess I can see how much larger I am but I don’t actually feel as large as I am and when I look into the mirror I think I look good most of the time. If I hated who I am then losing weight is NOT going to change that.

When I hear skinny or fit girls talk about how much weight they need to lose or they need to hit the gym because they are getting flabby or just downright insult themselves it makes me feel sorry that they have absolutely no self love. But when they start hating on me or criticizing me because I could lose some weight then they’re just being an ass. Don’t hate on me because you are not happy with yourself. People have to realize that not every “fat Chick” out wants to change their bodies, when we complain about something not being in our size, we are not particularly complaining about being fat we are complaining that they don’t make this in our size. Should I change my body because I like a pair of jeans that only comes in size XS, I don’t think so! Not for you or anybody!

Just adding some pictures

So I wanted to add some photos, these were taken a year and a half ago

same day insanity

So I want to type something and anything will do. I am sitting here with the itch to write something, I should do my homework but that could probably wait… or could it?? Eek I have been procrastinating so much lately it’s retarded. I now have a laptop which was my excuse for the past few months, I can’t use it anymore. What excuse can I use now? It took me ten years to complete I think another few nights wouldn’t heart as long as I finally graduate this spring.

I am sitting here listening to Treble Charger and it has me thinking back to a few years ago when I listened to this album all the time, I was one of the only few albums I had and I also didn’t have a computer, TV or phone so I was pretty bored… well no I wasn’t bored I spent most of my free time drawing, painting and reading. I kind of loved it actually; I remember feeling so relaxed back then. It might have had something to do with the fact that I was in my early 20’s and my only concern was to pay rent. I always had money because I never spent it on stuff like loads of groceries, crazy electric bills or exotic pets.

My groceries consisted of bread, cheese, noodles, hotdogs and bagels. I ate out a lot with my friends. Now I can spend about $150 to $200 every 2 weeks. Of course there are 2 of us eating and then there are all the pets we have to feed. My rent had everything included so heat and electricity was never a concern, now my rent is $50 less the place years ago but it doesn’t include heat or lights. I have to pay all that separate which becomes a hell of a lot more. There is the issue with needing internet; I never needed it before because I never owned a computer now I do and I use it often.

I haven’t read a book in almost a year. It just dawned on me that I am more relaxed when I would read a lot. I really need to get into reading again. Now that I am no longer doing email at work I have more time to read and I don’t know why I never took a book to school with me since I spend so much time on the bus and waiting for classes. I just need to get some book…David will download some as soon as I give him a list J what a doll.

Well mister changed the music because the album was over and the nostalgia is now gone. I just put in ear buds and turned on the Beatles, I don’t really have a memory linked to the Beatles… well songs like Octopuses Garden and Yellow Submarine remind me of when I was in elementary school. Music class with Mrs. Campbell use to rub her records on her butt and she always played those songs. She must have had a thing for Ringo Starr; I think if I ever run into her I will ask about that.

That story reminds me of that old apartment. There was this weird dude who lived upstairs from me and he use to come down to visit despite me wanting him there. I had to cover the window in my door and lock it all the time because he would just walk in. My friends and I came up with a secret knock so I would know it was them… “Taa Taa Tee tee taa” Mrs. Campbell use to get us to do this … I guess to keep rhythm or something… but my friends had her too so they were/are very familiar with “Taa Taa Tee Tee Taa”. Sometimes they would actually scream it as they knocked. My friends are awesome.

I think I should end things up here; this would be the second post today. There’s nothing like over compensating eh? Well I hope to keep this thing updated more often and maybe with something more entertaining. My life isn’t really full of awesomeness and fun but I try. Well… see ya around.

a little update of what has been going on

The adventures of getting a new computer...it isn’t really an adventure but it feels so nice to actually have a computer that I don’t have to wait to use or put someone out because my browsing interests do not interest them at all. He can now play his games and I can browse, facebook, tweet and update my blog. Prior to the laptop, he would play a movie or a show on one monitor for me and play his games on the other, this is a win win. Luckily we didn’t fight over the computer use, I think it was because I didn’t overly care and I felt that it was his machine to do whatever he wanted. Also he was always so considerate about it, making sure I was entertained before hopping on a game. He wouldn’t just leave me bored.

Well if this is going in my blog I guess I haven’t really mentioned who the “he” was because I haven’t updated in like a year. I suck at keeping updated… He is David and we started dating last March and he moved in May. Was that too fast?? Nah, he was here all the time and it just made sense then paying for rent if he wasn’t going to be there. It was a good choice; we don’t fight mainly because he doesn’t. I get mad, he laughs it off. If I’m being a total ass then he will call me out on it and rather than me being a total lunatic I will mostly back off.

We have pets, some we brought into the relationship and one that we got together. I owned 2 cats and he owned 4 rats (No worries they are all female so no reproducing). Together we decided to get a pet that would be both of ours; we decided to look into birds. We went to the pet shop thinking we were going to get budgies; we priced cages and the birds. We then came home to look on Kijiji for cages; we found a big cage for parrots for really cheap so we bought it. As we were picking it up the lady was talking about her previous bird being an African Gray… OMG I want an African Gray, they are totally awesome and way out of my price range. After buying the cage, David was having a look on Kijiji again for other pets and birds when he stumbled upon an African Gray being sold right here in town. WOW what are the odds?? Now it was still out of our price range but the deal was way cheaper than buying from a pet shop or a breeder. We couldn’t ignore the deal; it came included with the cage… I know we just got one but that’s ok, we could have 2. We did what any person in our situation would do… we asked our parents to help out!! They helped J We are now proud parents of an African Gray named Rorschach (roar-shack)David named him, because he reminded him of the Rorschach ink-blot tests and of course the comic book character. We realized it was the perfect name when David played a Youtube video of Rorschach (from movie) talking and our Rorschach made noises around us for the first time J

I will definitely be updating more about Bird, he is a brat as well as being a snuggle bum so those who have a love for birds would love it.